Have you seen The Secret Life of Walter Mitty? I wasn’t expecting much out of this movie, but once you sit down and watch it, it speaks volumes. Not only for people that may be stuck in a place and hope for more cooler things, but for me, it spoke to how much more adventurous I kind of expected life to be. I think this is something that every twenty something goes through, or at least, it seems like this is where I am all the time.
Purpose of life. The big question. It can be answered in so many ways, but if we get easily clouded by the answers thrown at us by society, or culture, religion, politics, or friends and family. It’s so easy to accept the answer given to us, because maybe we fear finding the answer ourselves. What if the purpose that we find, is not the right purpose? Is that the fear that holds us back? I’ve talked about this before, where when you realize the moment you are limitless, is where the fear can set in.
The other day, I had a dream where I was on house arrest (yeah my dreams are random!) and I was wondering how would I pass the time? What would I do to challenge myself and make myself happy? Reading? Would it be watching Netflicks? Watching drama after drama on Drama Fever? Painting? Using my law degree to get out of the situation?
Nope, none of those came to mind, except writing. I would write. I would blog. I would share my observations and thoughts with the world, as I lounge about in my adorable apartment style with quirky art work and French style kitchen. Is that my purpose? Is that how I would ‘see the world’? Is that the dream that I hope for myself?
As much as I’d like to take blogging as my main route, I understand that like anything in the creative industry, there is intense competition and my blog space is quite small in comparison; the risks are too high. I’m not much of a gambler. I try to avoid taking high risks as much as I can. Does this mean I lack the courage? Perhaps. Maybe, I fear the sense of failure too much. Going into the unknown is okay, as long as there is a wiki page about it, because who wants to go into anything blindly? This is probably why I don’t like roller-coasters: too many unexpected twists and turns I can’t prepare for.
I get that I’m not giving myself a chance here. After all, all great things begin with a risk. A risk, a chance you give yourself to find your medium. To find your moment to shine because that is what you do.
In my non-digital life, I have chosen a career that offers stability, offers status and offers a low risk investment with high return. Does that mean that this low-risk investment is what gets me jumping out of bed? Probably not; but does it give me a sense of accomplishment when my family members proudly say that, “yes, she is becoming X, Y, Z”. I would be lying if I said it didn’t.
Maybe 2015 is the year I take the chance on myself. Maybe this is the year that I complete my written life, and then aim for my dream life. A life unbound by rules, a life unbound of strings attached and where I take the road for me. It’ll be hard considering up until now, I have followed my written life quite diligently, but when else would I pursue it?